English is a crazy language

Let's face that English is a crazy language !
 We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes, but the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.

 One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese, yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

 You may find alone mouse or a nest full of mice, yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

 If the plural of man is always called men, why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

 There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

 And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

 If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
 If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

 We speak of a brother and also of brethren, but though we say mother, we never say methren.

 Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him, But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

 In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?

 We ship by truck but send cargo by ship. We have noses that run and feet that smell.

 We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.

 And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

 The plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't booth "beeth".

 When the alarm goes "off", it means it's "on".
 Why is 'quicksand' always slow ?

 And in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?


Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

nice